Politics: The Greatest Show On Earth

It’s an election year in the U.S once again. This year we will choose a new president. In addition to the usual debates and political advertisements, we also get a possible war with Iran and, let’s not forget, impeachment hearings. Never a dull moment in the theater of American politics.

On the left, depending on which news outlet you follow, we have in the lead, either Bernie Sanders promising free healthcare, college, and an average income of over $80,000, or Joe Biden who is busy trying to keep his hands to himself as he fumbles to identify exactly what his platform is. On the right, of course, we have Donald Trump as our incumbent.

Politics and presidents in America these days sure do provide a lot of entertainment. Before we look at our likely choices for this year, let’s do a quick recap of our presidents from recent history; Barack Obama, elected to two terms because of his charisma and race. A former community organizer chosen to lead the United States of America.

Next, we have Donald Trump, a former reality television star elected because he was the antithesis of everything the so-called “progressive “ left has been shoving down Middle America’s throats. You have to love the current two-party system of American politics, so principled and dedicated to the constitution!

This year, however, we have choices. Yes, in one of the democratic rings we have a confirmed socialist. In another democratic ring, we have a candidate who brings to mind someone’s creepy uncle. On the other side of the great American duopoly, we have Donald Trump, tweeter of mysterious words, currently knee-deep in impeachment proceedings.

This, however, is America, and despite the lack of media attention, we do have a third party on the ballots of most states. The libertarian party also offers us presidential options for this election year. Recently a gentleman with a boot on his head by the name of Vermin Supreme won the New Hampshire primary. For the benighted among us, no that is not a misprint. Vermin Supreme has been around for a while, he can be found all around the country, enthusiastically campaigning with the trademark boot on his head while touting a platform based on free ponies for everyone, and tougher laws on oral hygiene.

Just when you thought there were no viable candidates for this election, and maybe this is a good year to stay home on Election Day, a third-party candidate bursts forth like a herd of wild ponies. Who knows, if Mr. Supreme does receive the Libertarian nomination for president, perhaps he can bring back Deez Nuts to be his running mate.

It is a sad time in history when the greatest country on earth offers as presidential candidates a selection of individuals that can best be summed up as “clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right”. It’s only January, we have many months left of this spectacle. Get your popcorn and enjoy the greatest show on earth. Who knows, in the circus that has become the American government, maybe we could all use a pony.