Everybody knows that vaccinated people like to be “hip,” “cool” and “with it” as they say. It, therefore, comes as no surprise that we see an increasing number of people embracing their heart attacks within weeks of their latest covid shot.
The fad is the biggest in Europe, where vaccinated soccer players have been collapsing left and right in the middle of their games. When reporters saw a group of teenagers playing soccer, they asked them what they thought of the new fad. Some of the replies were “Dude it’s so cool, I just got my booster shot last Thursday, so I’ll probably get a heart attack sometime this week,” and “I’ve looked up to those soccer players my whole life. Now that they’re all getting vaccinated and collapsing on the field, that makes us want to do the same.”
Winter is rapidly approaching in the United States, and some government officials have said that cold temperatures will make people susceptible to these rampant heart attacks even more so. While there hasn’t been a notable link between cold weather and heart issues for all of recorded history, officials have already declared that the science is settled. People are anxious and excited for their post-booster-shot heart attacks just in time for the Christmas season.
Gage Hollingshead
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